Hi everyone, I’m Doug Gresenz, one of the founders of Redford Ranch Foundation. I want to start by saying my story is not unique and all too common to varying degrees, but I’m here to share a bit of my story . After growing up in a military household, watching my father serve this country in the USAF for 24 years. I enlisted in the Marine Corps in 2006 as infantry and was deployed to Haqlaniyah, Iraq in 2007 as part of Operation Iraqi Freedom (OIF). After making it home I struggled with my mental health , but the greatest challenge was faced in the years after my unit returned home as we were plagued with a number of suicides. My Marine brother and best friend, LCpl Christopher Harlan, took his own life on November 22, 2013 after his own deployment to Afghanistan for which he was awarded the purple heart. To say I was devastated would be an understatement, that event changed my life forever. Shortly after we laid Chris to rest, I was approached by a man who offered to take me kayak fishing.
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Unbeknownst to me at the time, this man would eventually become one of my closest friends and introduce me to more amazing people that remain in my close circle today. This was a large turning point in my life . I took him up on his offer, and we went kayak fishing in Aransas Pass, Texas. Although I did not catch any fish, I vividly remember telling him on our return to shore “his may be one of the coolest things I have ever done.” I was hooked, and not long after that, I ended up taking 30 days unpaid leave from work, 28 of which I spent in a kayak fishing on the Texas coast. Looking back, I realize those days spent on the water likely saved my life.
In early 2014 I was really struggling with Chris’s death. I sought help through the VA and I was diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and a mild Traumatic Brain Injury. I went through the gambit of VA endorsed “treatments” and fought an uphill battle daily. For years, professionals told me I was sick, that I had a disease, and I would need to take medications and be in therapy for the rest of my life. I was prescribed medication after medication, and then medications for the side effects of the medications I was taking. I was in a really dark place and attempted suicide myself. Thankfully, I did not succeed. I found myself in the psyche ward and inpatient treatment to “help” me through this time. When it was all said and done, I carried around two 1-gallon Ziplock bags of pill bottles everywhere I went, taking 14 or 15 different medications at times. My life and ability to continue moving forward began to deteriorate rapidly. I was unrecognizable to those who knew me. At times I was so heavily sedated friends and family would find me unconscious, unable to wake me . They either had to call an ambulance or take me to the ER. Doctors at multiple hospitals would hit me with Narcan thinking I was on opiates or heroin. I remember an ER doctor one night told me in the most serious way “If you stay on this cocktail of meds you are going to go to sleep one day and never wake up”. Despite the state my life was in, kayaking and fishing remained my one constant that got me through the day to day and gave me hope. Along with leading me to the realization that traditional “therapy” or “treatment” is not enough on its own, one needs to have something they are passionate about to give them that hope, to keep trying and keep making progress.
Even though I was struggling myself, I always helped those around me and remained eager to help my brothers and sisters in arms who were facing similar struggles in a bigger way. All of this led to acquiring my kayak instructor certification. After starting the process of reducing the medications I was on, I experienced extreme withdrawal effects/symptoms, resulting in numerous falls and a series of more serious head injuries in 2018 that would again alter my life forever. Neurological complications from repeated head injuries made me unable to use my legs at all. I stuttered uncontrollably and couldn’t remember where I was or what I was doing. I developed extreme light sensitivity, debilitating migraines, loss of balance and motor functions along with muscle spasms that continue today. The spasms ultimately caused my ankle to become deformed as well as other complications. At some point I realized I was going to have to act if I wanted to continue kayaking and living a somewhat normal life. I focused on continuing the long process of reducing the medications I was on at a safe rate with my doctors, participated in extensive physical therapy, occupational therapy, speech therapy, mental therapy, as well as introduced a healthier diet and lifestyle. I was able to gain some control over my deteriorating physical abilities. I also earned my certification in adaptive paddling along the way, which allowed me to continue kayaking myself and help others in the future. Even then it took multiple surgeries and several years of continued rehab, I still have limited mobility in my right leg and work to do myself, but I have yet to let that slow me down.
As I mentioned, even during my own struggles, I have held on to a burning desire to help my fellow service members. Somewhere along the way, I started dreaming of being able to pass on the gift of kayaking, which saved my life and gave me passion and purpose. The idea of Redford Ranch was formed, and I started slowly getting everything in order. Over several years, the dream has grown to what it is today. Originally, I just wanted to add extra rooms to the handicapped accessible home I was building for myself so I could bring people in to go kayak fishing. I wanted to do this all because someone had done that for me and it affected the course of my life. The “dream” has drastically changed as I have learned more and grown through my journey. I very quickly realized kayaking was my thing and that it was a crucial piece to MY PUZZLE, not everyone’s puzzle looks the same. Now, there is a team of people working towards the goal of building an adaptive, accessible facility large enough to host all types of groups of people and organizations who use different activities for healing. Who also share our passion for natural healing methods as well as our vision of “passion and purpose” being a crucial aspect to success in treatment. It’s incredible to be a part of this and watch it grow into what it is now.
The unique environment of the south Texas Gulf Coast has always had my heart. I knew that was where I needed to base my operations. In late 2019, I was able to purchase five acres of rural property in Aransas Pass, Texas. The property sits just over a mile from Conn Brown Harbor which has arguably some of the most captivating wildlife and abundant coastal grass flats in the country. Natural therapies, the outdoors especially, have been clinically proven to reduce stress, anxiety, and several other TBI/PTSD symptoms. In my opinion there is no better place to participate in these activities then the Coastal bend in Texas. My goal is to be able to pass on these remarkable experiences and help those who have served our great country find their purpose. I have found my purpose and a worthy cause to devote my life to.
Now it’s your turn. All are welcome at the Redford Ranch.
In early 2014 I was really struggling with Chris’s death. I sought help through the VA and I was diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and a mild Traumatic Brain Injury. I went through the gambit of VA endorsed “treatments” and fought an uphill battle daily. For years, professionals told me I was sick, that I had a disease, and I would need to take medications and be in therapy for the rest of my life. I was prescribed medication after medication, and then medications for the side effects of the medications I was taking. I was in a really dark place and attempted suicide myself. Thankfully, I did not succeed. I found myself in the psyche ward and inpatient treatment to “help” me through this time. When it was all said and done, I carried around two 1-gallon Ziplock bags of pill bottles everywhere I went, taking 14 or 15 different medications at times. My life and ability to continue moving forward began to deteriorate rapidly. I was unrecognizable to those who knew me. At times I was so heavily sedated friends and family would find me unconscious, unable to wake me . They either had to call an ambulance or take me to the ER. Doctors at multiple hospitals would hit me with Narcan thinking I was on opiates or heroin. I remember an ER doctor one night told me in the most serious way “If you stay on this cocktail of meds you are going to go to sleep one day and never wake up”. Despite the state my life was in, kayaking and fishing remained my one constant that got me through the day to day and gave me hope. Along with leading me to the realization that traditional “therapy” or “treatment” is not enough on its own, one needs to have something they are passionate about to give them that hope, to keep trying and keep making progress.
Even though I was struggling myself, I always helped those around me and remained eager to help my brothers and sisters in arms who were facing similar struggles in a bigger way. All of this led to acquiring my kayak instructor certification. After starting the process of reducing the medications I was on, I experienced extreme withdrawal effects/symptoms, resulting in numerous falls and a series of more serious head injuries in 2018 that would again alter my life forever. Neurological complications from repeated head injuries made me unable to use my legs at all. I stuttered uncontrollably and couldn’t remember where I was or what I was doing. I developed extreme light sensitivity, debilitating migraines, loss of balance and motor functions along with muscle spasms that continue today. The spasms ultimately caused my ankle to become deformed as well as other complications. At some point I realized I was going to have to act if I wanted to continue kayaking and living a somewhat normal life. I focused on continuing the long process of reducing the medications I was on at a safe rate with my doctors, participated in extensive physical therapy, occupational therapy, speech therapy, mental therapy, as well as introduced a healthier diet and lifestyle. I was able to gain some control over my deteriorating physical abilities. I also earned my certification in adaptive paddling along the way, which allowed me to continue kayaking myself and help others in the future. Even then it took multiple surgeries and several years of continued rehab, I still have limited mobility in my right leg and work to do myself, but I have yet to let that slow me down.
As I mentioned, even during my own struggles, I have held on to a burning desire to help my fellow service members. Somewhere along the way, I started dreaming of being able to pass on the gift of kayaking, which saved my life and gave me passion and purpose. The idea of Redford Ranch was formed, and I started slowly getting everything in order. Over several years, the dream has grown to what it is today. Originally, I just wanted to add extra rooms to the handicapped accessible home I was building for myself so I could bring people in to go kayak fishing. I wanted to do this all because someone had done that for me and it affected the course of my life. The “dream” has drastically changed as I have learned more and grown through my journey. I very quickly realized kayaking was my thing and that it was a crucial piece to MY PUZZLE, not everyone’s puzzle looks the same. Now, there is a team of people working towards the goal of building an adaptive, accessible facility large enough to host all types of groups of people and organizations who use different activities for healing. Who also share our passion for natural healing methods as well as our vision of “passion and purpose” being a crucial aspect to success in treatment. It’s incredible to be a part of this and watch it grow into what it is now.
The unique environment of the south Texas Gulf Coast has always had my heart. I knew that was where I needed to base my operations. In late 2019, I was able to purchase five acres of rural property in Aransas Pass, Texas. The property sits just over a mile from Conn Brown Harbor which has arguably some of the most captivating wildlife and abundant coastal grass flats in the country. Natural therapies, the outdoors especially, have been clinically proven to reduce stress, anxiety, and several other TBI/PTSD symptoms. In my opinion there is no better place to participate in these activities then the Coastal bend in Texas. My goal is to be able to pass on these remarkable experiences and help those who have served our great country find their purpose. I have found my purpose and a worthy cause to devote my life to.
Now it’s your turn. All are welcome at the Redford Ranch.